It’s hard to know how to introduce a blog post when your last one was 6 months ago! Where do I even start?! I wrote my last post the day after I completed London Marathon and to say I was on a high would be a huge understatement. I was on cloud nine! I loved having a goal to work towards and completing that particular goal gave me a sense of achievement like never before. I mean that probably goes without saying; it was 26.2 chuffing miles!
Since the marathon, I haven’t worked towards any exercise-related goals. That doesn’t bother me too much though because after all of the training in the months leading up to London, I was ready for a bit of rest and relaxation. I kicked off the R&R with a trip to one of my favourite places with one of my favourite people; Marrakech with my work friend Laura. Going away for a few days with her at the time I did was a game changer. Laura is an absolute breath of fresh air…she didn’t wake up in a morning worrying about what to wear, she didn’t ask me to take posed photos of her all day, every day and she didn’t choose meals based on their fat content. There’s something really amazing about being around people who aren’t consumed by the same difficulties you are; looks, weight and food. It made me focus on other things too and let me tell you…I bloody loved it!
Laura is one of these people who is genuinely and effortlessly gorgeous. She radiates positivity and this shows; she is as beautiful on the inside as she is on the out. It made me realise even more so that although I might scrub up okay, my lack of self confidence about weight & physical appearance isn’t attractive. I’m not saying anyone chooses to focus on this, certainly not on a conscious level, but I’ve been someone who highlights my ‘flaws’ before anyone else gets the chance to. WHY DO WE DO THIS?!? Since London and the subsequent trip to Marrakech, I’ve tried really hard to be kind to myself.
It’s still a work in progress. It upset me that a new starter at work picked up on how self-depreciating I can be, even though I say it in a ‘jokey way’. I don’t want to come across like that but I accept that it’s a habit and one I need to continue to work on. I’ve noticed big changes though, even if they’re not showing on the outside just yet. I can look in a mirror and be more positive, rather than focussing on my ‘flaws’ (or what I had convinced myself were flaws anyway). I don’t find myself saying “when I lose weight I will…”. I’m accepting myself for who I am and not focusing as much on what I look like/ how much I weigh etc. In doing this, it’s freed me up to focus on other things. I’ve recently sold my house & I’m keeping my fingers crossed for my dream pad. I genuinely feel that there are really exciting times ahead for me. Moral of the story…clear out your head and you might just make space for new possibilities 💁🏼